Listen

To withhold myself and listen
When my heartbeat wont stop flying
To deny myself the simple right
of selfish ambition
By physical power
to prevent my indulging
in pleasurable worry
To stop myself and listen.
By mind I lose to personal daydreams
By heart to distracting desires
By decision I withhold
my personal pursuits
silence my spider-web mind of matters
and Listen
when there is someone speaking
To hear when someone calls
To learn when someone teaches
What have I missed
in searching for what I thought I wanted?
Who have I hurt
in finding what I thought healed me?
Home I have lost
in the race for some elusive ‘other’
Call me home
And I will come
Hear my call
Answer me
I withhold myself to listen.

9th March 2010

Moth

What is life, but a few more hours of adventure?
What is a life saved to be lost months later?
What is a name
engraved on a tombstone wall?
What is the line between the light and the darkness?
What has been lost to me
by the fall of my faces, my society
my loves, my friends
My mother
What is more glorious than the touch in the darkness
than the pounding of light between hands
The swinging in the sky
The sailing of wings in the air
To pound and pull and strain to fly
higher and higher and higher away

25th January 2010

Seen

Seen
For the lies I’ve told
Though my eyes told the truth.
And my heart yearned that you know
with out my saying.

Seen
For the smiles you mocked
Though my heart was warmed
With the thoughts you found
To be low

Seen
For the tears
I needn’t have shed
‘Cause I thought there was more wrong
Than there ever had to be

Yet I made the anger real
I made the tears a joke
I made the laughter die
I made the lies belie
What I wanted you to know.
This is a paradox of expression
In that I let you see
what I was not,
I let myself conform
To the shape of your eyes.
Forgive me though
you may not.
I still choose
To forgive myself.

26th April 2010

Cocoon

The running, the screaming
The friends and the teaming
Your cries, and my lies
Your laughter so harsh
to my ears.

This talking,
not walking
Sitting, tick-tocking
Your faces so blind
to my fears.

This moment not stopping
My clattering talking
Till your hand comes to rest
on my tears.

Some slowing,
Some stopping,
Quiet and rocking
wiping, and soothing
slowing,
then stopping.

Peace swallows chaos,
Takes chaos in its arms and puts it to sleep,
and there in cocoons, the chaos blooms,
and grows into blossoms of a better kind of light,
and there in cocoons, the chaos blooms
and forms the foundation of a better kind of life.

16th April 2010